Anti-Diet Culture: Plus sized bodies in pole and fitness

TRIGGER WARNINGS: diet culture, discussions of body weight, weight loss

As 2025 kicks off, many of us are bombarded with the same old rhetoric: diet ads, "New Year New You" slogans, and a hyper focus on shrinking bodies.

Here at Peachy Poler Online we reject the toxic narrative surrounding diet and fitness, which is more loud than ever around this time of year. We are committed to celebrating every shape, size and story. Pole is for ALL BODIES.

This month, we are honoured to welcome two trailblazing pole dancers from the plus sized community to lead a powerful conversation about anti-diet culture, body acceptance, and reclaiming fitness on our own terms. These two pole dancers are very inspiring to me and they are CHANGING THE GAME by being outspoken on this topic.

Foreword from the panelists:

Intersectionality is very important when it comes to the body positivity movement. It is important to take into consideration the differences in power and privilege, and also the differences in lived experiences within this community which will differ if someone is disabled, NB or trans, a person of colour and more.

These experiences and views do not represent everyone within the community, but are important to listen to regardless.

Everybody: listen up!

@_velvetsummer

Velvet Summer (she/her)

@james_pole_diary

Hi! I'm Velvet Summer. I'm a Midlands-based pole dancer although I have previously dabbled in aerial hoop.

My signature style is slow and slinky, milking every movement and exciting my audience.

I'm the owner of Plus Size Pole and Aerial which is a small venture that aims to build community, and create safe spaces and opportunities for plus size pole and aerial folks.

James Jelicious (she/her)

I have been poling for almost 2 years now and it has been the final part of my body acceptance journey!

From a shy beginner to an unapologetic fattie, pole has helped me embrace my body and sensuality and also just be amazed at what my body can do!

In 2023, I founded Queer Draw Brum to create a safe space for LGBTQ+ individuals to explore art. The group's life drawing sessions celebrate queer bodies, and has highlighted our bodies are just that: bodies.

When striving for body neutrality and acceptance, it is only yourself that can make the difference, it is about adjusting your mindset and being kind to yourself!

(There are 10 questions to this Q+A)

1. How has diet culture impacted your relationship with movement, fitness, or pole dancing?

J:Historically, I’ve had a bad relationship with movement and fitness because ever since I can remember, I’ve been fat. I did ballet and tap, and most of my memories are good, but this one moment stands out:

my teacher physically grabbed my belly because “it was no good,” and I was only around 10 years old.

At school, the PE staff bullied me for being fat. I used to be good at swimming, but the school assumed I’d be awful at it because I was fat, so I thought, Why bother? At university, my focus was on losing weight, but society makes you feel it’s embarrassing to do fitness as a fat person. I played hockey as a “safer” option because it’s a sport where bigger people are more common. Big thanks to hockey for my power thighs, which are great for pole!

From 16-22, I was indoctrinated into diet culture with Slimming World, which teaches harmful eating habits. People in the group would suggest extreme measures like taking boiled eggs to a wedding. Diet culture made me focus on losing weight, not fitness. Now, I enjoy movement for how it makes me feel, not to shrink myself.

V: I’ve been aware of diet culture from an early age. As a competitive windsurfer for Great Britain, I was pressured to be a smaller size. At 14, we had to submit our weight and were told if we needed to lose weight based on a set “ideal.” This pressure led me into diet culture, and I spent years wasting money on detox teas, fat burners, and unnecessary supplements.

By my mid-twenties, exercise became about shrinking my body, not enjoying it. When I started pole dancing, I was still struggling with an eating disorder, but over time, I realized that true friends care more about your abilities than your appearance. Now, I view exercise as a way to feel good, not to punish my body.

In 2022, I walked the Southwest Coastal Path with my husband, fueling my body properly and listening to its needs.

Diet culture teaches us to ignore our bodies, but now I embrace the idea that we deserve to feel good, no matter our size.

2. What does body positivity or neutrality mean to you personally?

J: I think in an ideal world everyone would have a good relationship with their body and have ‘body positivity,’ but it is hard to achieve for various reasons, not just fatness. In recent years, it has also been deployed as a marketing strategy.

In my experience, when you are a fat person, there is an expectation that you must have body positivity if you reject diet culture, especially in spaces such as fitness and pole dance. Conversely, you’ll also get told off for “encouraging an unhealthy lifestyle and body” if you don’t hide away as a fat person. But in fact, you don’t owe anyone anything, including body positivity.

It might seem a bit contradictory because I am very open that I think I am sexy, and yes, I am fat, and my Instagram probably screams ‘body positivity’ to others, but I think the important point is you don’t owe anyone that as a fat person. I think body neutrality is a realistic and achievable goal that encourages a healthier relationship with your own body, but it is spoken about less because it’s not exactly a sexy word for advertising!

As much as capitalism doesn’t want you to think so, our bodies are just that—they are our bodies. Everyone’s body is valid and worthy. Your self-worth and happiness are not dependent on thinness. Please be kind to yourself and your body!

V: I think with this question, it's important to recognize and acknowledge the roots of the Body Positive movement. The movement was founded by fat Black women, and there’s some great literature available to learn more about this. Generally, it has been hijacked by the wellness industry in more recent years as a way to rebrand and repackage diet culture and fatphobia. This isn’t to say that all spaces that talk about and aim to champion body positivity are using it as a façade, but rather that we should be wary of brands and people who talk the talk but fail to walk the walk.

I find that body neutrality is much more achievable for the majority of people and is something that I tend to align with more than body positivity. In my experience, striving for body positivity can sometimes leave people feeling stuck or like they might be "failing."

It is very difficult to be positive about your body all the time, especially when you consider all the external pressures and constantly changing messaging about how our bodies should look or function. I have definitely found that body neutrality works best for me.

It means I can look at my body for what it is without passing judgment; I’m not classifying my body as good or bad. If you say something is one thing, it also leaves space for the opposite of that thing to exist too—if that makes sense.

So, neutrality feels like a much better position for me, for my brain, and for my health. It means if my body changes, that’s okay. I don’t need to label it as positive or negative; it’s just my body doing its thing, and I need to let it do its thing.

3. How do you approach movement and exercise in a way that feels empowering rather than punishing?

J: Part of the reason I love pole dancing as my form of exercise is because it is such a varied movement, and you can really take it anywhere you want to go with it. Strength training, flow or crazy tricks and all the different styles etc. My sort of attitude is I do the exercise and the movement I do because I enjoy it and it makes me feel good and I try not to give it any large unrealistic goals. Start a form of movement you enjoy for the simple reason you enjoy it and you feel good when you do it!

Doing exercise with friends, making it more of a social time, has really helped me to change my perspective on exercise. Also, we’re not at school anymore, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. It may seem obvious, but realising you are in control of the movement or exercise you do can be so freeing. 

V: I’ve noticed a change in my approach to exercise and movement over the past 5 to 6 years, especially in how I frame it. Thinking of it as "movement" rather than "exercise" has helped me personally, because I still have a negative association with the word “exercise.”

When I think of exercise, it often feels like something done with the intention of changing the body. While there are times I’d like to be a bit stronger or more flexible to perform a particular move, I balance these goals with the reality of life, my mental health, and being neurospicy. It’s much easier to see movement as just that. And I think it’s empowering to move simply because you enjoy it. There’s power in that.

We’re often told that movement and exercise should be done with a purpose: to change a physical characteristic. But I believe it’s more important to move because it’s fun, because we get to see our friends, and because we get to celebrate little achievements together if we want to.

I also find the sexier styles of pole, like stripper-style, to be quite freeing. It’s empowering for me to reclaim the power of existing in a fat body, especially when society often tries to tell us that fat people aren’t sexy, shouldn’t show skin, or shouldn’t feel confident.

Exploring stripper-style pole has been an absolute gift. I feel so blessed and honoured to learn from all the incredible strippers and sex workers who have shared their knowledge with us.

I’m grateful for their experience, especially since their wisdom has been gained by working in a heavily stigmatized industry, where many have expressed experiencing abuse and harassment at work. Learning from them has helped me appreciate my body and feel sexy when I dance. That feeling is empowering and freeing. Throwing away the made-up societal rules about how we should or shouldn’t behave feels like reclaiming my own power.

4. What advice would you give to someone struggling with body image, especially during New Year’s when diet culture is so loud?

J: So, some advice would be to protect yourself and not hang out with people that you know have damaging opinions around food and diet culture. But the most important thing I found for me is not about other people it’s really been myself!

I had to get myself to a point where despite what other people around me are saying I know in myself I’m fat and it’s okay and I can eat what I want when I feel like it and my body does not reflect my worth. Easier said than done, I understand but at the same time it’s so much easier to change your own perspective than try and change the perspective of everyone around you.

The best way to do this: BE NAKED 😂 I’m not kidding, the more face-to-face time you have with your body and the more you see it in a neutral setting, just chilling at home, it’s just like another thing that you see all the time. Like exposure therapy I guess for your own body.

V:I think it can be difficult to give one-size-fits-all advice because everyone’s situation is unique. We share some experiences, but also have unique ones—our upbringing, the people around us, coaches, and societal influences. Whether it’s a specific food trend, weight-loss pressure, or the constant barrage of diet culture, it’s not the same for everyone.

But if you’re struggling with body image, try being kind to yourself. Consider yourself a complex, nuanced human deserving love, support, and care, no matter what anyone else says. You are deserving just as you are. You don’t need to change. Your body has carried you this far—how incredible is that?!

There will be ups and downs, but that doesn’t take away from who you are or make you any less deserving of happiness and self-acceptance.

If you’re on social media or involved in pole spaces, make sure they reflect diversity and represent people who look like you.

Follow people who are bigger, smaller, and from all abilities—follow strippers, sex workers, and spaces that make you feel good. It’s important to see all bodies in the pole world and celebrate your uniqueness. Our subconscious may compare without us knowing, so feed your mind with diverse images. Ensure your feed and community, both online and offline, reflect body diversity.

Finally, if you’re struggling, consider reaching out to a professional. My advice is based on my experience, but I’m not a professional. Anti-fat bias exists in the medical field, so it’s not always easy, but the right professional can offer personalized support.

When speaking with medical professionals, you can set boundaries—ask that your weight isn’t discussed and for a note to be put on your records. If your weight needs to be taken, you can ask not to see the scales or have the number read aloud. Advocating for yourself can be tough, but you deserve kindness and respect.

5. How can fitness spaces like pole studios be more inclusive for plus-sized people?

J: I think it is so important that if you are going be a space that is teaching other people, especially if on your social media you preach that you’re for all bodies and you’re inclusive, that you then have actually taken the time to learn how to teach other bodies.

The difference in me sticking with pole rather than calling it a day at the beginning when I couldn’t do much was due to my first instructor, Chrissy. As an instructor she has taken the time to learn how to teach other bodies and could tell me adjustments I needed to get in certain moves! She was such an encouragement and I’m so glad I stuck with it because as you can see the rest is history and now I’m hooked.

Also, as a fitness space it is important you are aware of how words you use on social media will be interpreted by your students. Be conscious of the message your words are conveying and think about what that word means in today’s society, not just the literal dictionary definition. It’s important when you’re leading a fitness space to listen to feedback from your students. 

V: This is something I definitely have strong feelings about. Through my latest venture – Plus Size Pole and Aerial – I’ve had discussions and formed opinions on this topic. Studios and other spaces can be more inclusive in many ways. Something as simple as branded clothing can make plus-sized participants feel alienated.

Your plus-size students shouldn’t have to miss out just because a studio hasn’t considered people larger than UK size 14-16. Instead of making customers ask for larger sizes, the studio should research where to get good-quality, larger sizes.

Spaces should also be mindful of the language they use. Owners and instructors have a duty of care to all their students—not just the majority, but to everyone. We need to avoid language that focuses on being smaller or thinner. Commenting on weight, even with good intentions, is inappropriate and harmful.

Moving away from this behavior can help plus-sized students feel more comfortable and less tense. It’s especially important when a slim person comments on looking “fat” while an actual fat person is present.

Studios should also ensure their marketing and social media reflect plus-sized students. There should be transparency on weight limits for equipment, clearly communicated before students pay for classes. If your studio has seating, ensure chairs don’t have arms, so larger-bodied people aren’t uncomfortable.

If there are toilets, are they large enough for someone to enter easily? If not, can you remove clutter to create more space?

Lastly, instructors need to learn, train, and explore under the guidance of plus-sized individuals. They should understand how to properly spot us on the pole and adjust movements to accommodate our bodies (e.g., getting our bellies around the pole or fitting our arms through gaps).

Instructors can’t be forced to learn, but studios should encourage this. If a plus-sized person can’t do something, it doesn’t mean they need to lose weight (yes, shocking, but I’ve heard a studio say this). They just need instructors who are willing to learn and adapt.

James and Velvet <3

6. What shifts in mindset have helped you embrace your body and focus on joy rather than societal pressures?

J: There is such a strong narrative of exercise is for weight loss that it can be hard mentally to overcome this, but dissolving the stressors related to exercise makes room for the fun.   You’re told it’s embarrassing to do exercise as a fat person so you shy away from it and I think it’s been in the last few years where my own mental relationship around my body has really improved.

I wanted to do some movement for fun and what was something I’d wanted to try for years… pole! I was apprehensive because everyone looks so slim, fit and strong, which was not me haha and then I had big light bulb moment: that’s the exact sort of mentality that I’ve put all the work in to avoid so I’m going to!

I think starting the pole dancing as well has just basically been a way to like cement all the work I put into my mental relationship with body image and my weight over the past few years and yeah I love moving I love dancing I love pole and I’m fat and I do it and that’s not embarrassing and it’s great. 

Don’t wait to do the fun thing eg dancing, buying awesome clothes or getting a tattoo “until I’ve lost some weight” and just go for it and enjoy yourself, realise your body can do things, whatever clothes size you happen to be! 

V: Body neutrality is definitely a change or a shift for me. It’s helped me to remove societal pressures and actually just enjoy being me and being in my body. Learning from plus size instructors who have the lived experience and teach in a way that is considerate, mindful and inclusive helped me shift my mind-set.

Beanie the Jet and Ella Aur, who are both instructors are really great for this. I think there's something really important that people can learn from instructors in larger bodies. I’m not saying that having a larger body automatically makes someone a brilliant instructor, but they have a different point of view, a different lived experience that brings a unique perspective. Having them as an instructor removes any anxieties that might exist around talking about our bellies needing to be physically moved or other ways that our fat bodies need to be accommodated. This allows the room to breathe.  

I also think that larger bodied instructors have done much deeper learning, and more often than not, they’ve rejected the idea of "movement supremacy." By that, I mean the idea that there’s only one right or "good" way to move. This notion—that toes must always be pointed, that movement isn’t valid unless you’ve got a perfectly arched back and your shoulders are down and your head is up—is really restrictive.

It’s rooted in the idea that only a fine-tuned, muscular, thin body is the standard for valid movement. But the reality is that all movement is valid. All variations of movement are valid. Whatever you need to do to make accommodations for your body is cool, and it’s awesome that you’re aware of that. More people need to realize that as long as we’re moving safely, there is no wrong way to do it. 

7. Are there any myths about plus-sized bodies and fitness that you’d like to bust?

J: The biggest one that really grinds my gears is that if you see a fat person exercising it’s for the sole reason that they want to lose weight. No no and no.  

I remember a time in a studio I used to train in where one of the girls was like “oh wow you look amazing, I can see you’ve lost so much weight since you started pole”, just assuming it was a compliment.

That irritated me because I had never at any point said I was doing this to lose weight I had never suggested I wanted to lose weight but basically, she looked at me, saw a fat person that had started doing some exercise and was like it’s obviously to lose weight.

I just don’t think you should comment on other people’s bodies. Another misconception is if you’re fat then you’re not fit or strong… those things can and do coexist. There are not forms of exercise you can’t do if you’re fat, but there are instructors who don’t know how to teach/train fat people. 

V: I think one of the biggest myths is that plus-sized bodies aren’t as strong, flexible, or sexy as other bodies, or that they can't move in the same ways. The reality is that plus-sized bodies can move just as well as any other bodies.

They can be elegant, graceful, strong, and sexy. But plus sized bodies should be allowed the same space as slim bodied folks to also be average. We are just as valid when we are average, as we are when we’re exceptional.

Neither is better than the other. And being exceptional shouldn’t be a pre-requisite in order to be respected. 

There is huge myth that fat people are inherently unhealthy – just by being fat. Health is such a complex and nuanced topic but more often people would rather see it as black and white and there are so many societal structures at play that can influence someone’s ‘health’. 

There’s also people who believe that it’s okay to be fat as long as you’re healthy. We don’t apply that same rule to any other body size. We don’t go around telling thin people that it’s fine to be thin as long as they’re healthy—so why are we doing that with fat bodies?

It’s a strange and inconsistent approach, and often just used to disguise someone's fatphobia. Regardless, fat people are worthy and deserving of respect regardless of whether you deem them to be healthy or not.

So yes, plus sized folks can be strong, flexible, and sexy, but we don’t have to be any of those things to be valid. We are valid regardless, just as any other body size is valid, regardless of what a body is able or not able to do. We need to move away from setting requirements for what a plus-sized body must be in order to be "acceptable." All bodies, all sizes, are valid and worthy. 

8. What role does the queer and/or female-focused environment play in creating a safer, more welcoming space for you?

J: I think in this sense I have an advantage as I am queer so I already have distanced myself from heteronormative standards and it is of no concern to me how I will be perceived by men.

This helped me to reject society ‘s expectations of what my body should be as a woman. I also think on an establishment level if you’re female focused and strive to be safe and inclusive for queer people, it gives people the security to let go in that space and explore their body’s movements for themselves, not for external gratification.

These spaces also allow individuals space to share their experiences, and realise we have shared/similar experiences, which encourages support and empathy. Discussing our experiences can not only help people to protect themselves in future but also reduces the feeling of isolation that you can find yourself in during hard times.  

V: I tend to feel safer when I'm in queer led or queer centred spaces. Although my queerness may be less obvious due to being in a straight-presenting relationship, I know that queer-friendly spaces are generally safer and more welcoming than any other spaces. If a space isn't queer-friendly, then it's not friendly for me.

Whether you think you're fat-inclusive or not, if you're not inclusive of queer people, I don’t want to be there.

Personally, I haven’t been to any pole spaces that class themselves as female focused, but I would be wary as to what is meant by female focused and whether they are inclusive of trans, non-binary and gender-queer folks or whether they are exclusively for cis-women. For me, if a space excludes trans, non-binary and genderqueer people then I don’t feel like it’s a safe space and I don’t want to be a part of it. 

9. How do you celebrate your body and its abilities, regardless of size or weight?

J: I found this question hard to answer as it is not something I have really thought about, and then I thought maybe that is the answer!

I take up space as a fat woman unapologetically and I live my life. I wear the fun bright clothes; I do the eye-catching makeup, and I laugh loud. I dress how I want to dress not for ‘what will look good on my body size and shape’. I go for walks because I enjoy being in nature, I wear a bikini at the pool, I will eat what I want.

After years of putting my body through so much, I am gentle and kind to her and grateful she stuck with me while I unlearnt damaging ideas. I listen to my body and what she needs, rather than what society has told me she needs. 

V: For me, learning to listen to and be in tune with your body is key in being able to celebrate it, regardless of size or weight. If you can recognize what your body is experiencing—whether it's aches, pains, tightness, or looseness—and acknowledge those things, you can also appreciate how your body is just doing life every day.

Your body brings what it’s got in the moment, and recognizing that can help you celebrate it more often. 

If you bring what you’ve got in that moment, then you can express gratitude and celebrate your body more frequently, regardless of its physical size. If you learn to seek and practice gratitude in your day-to-day life—whether in exercise or movement—you can start to genuinely celebrate who you are and what your body is doing for you.

For me, practicing gratitude has been key to connecting with my body. I use gratitude in order to reflect on where I am and how I’m feeling and to connect deeper with my movement, to what I'm experiencing. By doing this, I find I’m able recognize my achievements, celebrate them, and reflect on what I might want to work toward next. 

10. What message would you share with others about rejecting diet culture this New Year?

J: I think fundamentally diet culture is just about making money off people! Developing unhealthy eating habits that aren’t maintainable in the long run so you go back to the diet or seek out new diets to try!

At the end of the day food isn’t a reward or a punishment, it is how we fuel our bodies to sustain us. It’s very important to surround yourself with the right people and create that safe encouraging environment for you where you’re not being told New Year, new me, new diet, same bs. And don’t forget, be more naked!

V: My message would be: Your body, regardless of its size, is valid and worthy of respect and love. It doesn't matter how much or how little movement you do; you are still valid and worthy. A body is no more or less moral than any other body simply because of its size.

We need to stop setting prerequisites for fat bodies, in order for them to be deemed acceptable. If we can remove these barriers, we can begin to break down the walls of diet culture and move toward body neutrality—if not body positivity (if thats what works for you) — and work towards fat liberation.

We need to start celebrating ourselves as we are. Also, remember that diet culture, the diet industry, and the wellness industry are huge money-makers for people who profit from feeding off of insecurities.

That's an awful thing to do to others. But you have the power to take back control by rejecting the messages that tell you to change your body to fit an unattainable, ever-changing standard. 

And finally, if you are struggling, reach out to someone you trust or to a medical professional. You don’t have to work through any of this alone. 

For the uncut version, please click HERE to view